An accountant is in a car travelling with a farmer client around his farm. They pass a large mob of sheep and the farmer says, “You’re pretty good with numbers, Keith. How many sheep do you reckon are in that paddock? “The accountant looks at the sheep for a moment and says, “One thousand, eight hundred and thirty two.”The farmer is amazed. “Exactly right”, he says. “How did you work that out so fast?””Easy,” says the accountant “I counted the number of feet and divided by 4.”
An agriculture student said to a farmer: “Your methods are too old fashioned. I won’t be surprised if this tree will give you less than 20kg of apples.”
“I won’t be surprised either,” said the farmer, “this is an orange tree.”
FARMER: Did you sleep well last night?
GUEST: No, the bed was soft and the air was fresh, but an old sow kept pushing at the door. FARMER: Never mind her. She always gets upset when we rent out her room.
A farmer in Devon has successfully grown a field full of vibrators;
unfortunately he now has a problem with Squatters.
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